The month of October is Attachment Parenting Month and I am an attachment parent myself. If you are not familiar with attachment parenting the API web site has this to say:
The essence of Attachment Parenting is about forming and nurturing strong connections between parents and their children. Attachment Parenting challenges us as parents to treat our children with kindness, respect and dignity, and to model in our interactions with them the way we’d like them to interact with others.
For me being an attached parents means non-violent communication and putting a bond with my kids foremost. It means modeling what I want them to learn and not being a “do as I say” parent. It also means following my instincts before conventional wisdom…aka who cares if “experts” say that baby shouldn’t sleep in your bed…instinctually I know my child needs to be with me at night. In the early years it meant extended breastfeeding, co-sleeping, baby wearing, and being abundantly, even excessively (if there is such a thing) affectionate. As my children grow it means finding new ways to connect with them, be patient with them, and above all give them my time and presence. That is the theme for Attachment Parenting Month – Giving Our Children Presence.
In honor of that I decided to make a list of the ways I promise to give my kids my presence even more this year. Among the items on that list is a promise to buy season passes for the zoo and the science museum this year so that we can go more often without money being a concern. We also plan to visit our Metro Parks more often going on hikes, walks, and picnics. We have some beautiful parks here to….17 just in our area. We have also been scouting some day trips that would be nice for weekend getaways. We are talking right now with another family about buying and RV together so we can make these trips more practical for younger kiddos and have more reasons to get away together. We also want to start a regular game night where we play board games with the kids. I do this quite often already but my hubby’s schedule usually excludes him so we need to work on that. I plan to take my two oldest kids to all the children’s plays at our local playhouse this year. Our first one is Sunday.
We have really been ramping up our efforts in this regard for a month or two now and I can say with great enthusiasm that we really love to be together and spend time together. Even just making dinner together and sitting around the table is fun and enjoyable…we just don’t get to do it as much as we would like because hubby works odd hours and nights. We hope to change that eventually.
I think we do a great job of giving our kids presence but it is still not enough IMO and I thank API for the reminders. They have some great suggested activities on their blog this month if you are interested. My favorite so far was the suggestion to hug your child ten times today for no reason. LOVE it!
So tell me…what is your best tip for giving your child the gift of presence?
